Couples Counseling


The Challenge of Relationships

Here’s something you already know:  being in a marriage or other committed relationship offers the hope of addressing what feel like fundamental, hard-wired needs for connection, safety and companionship.  Unfortunately, you might also know the pain and frustration that happens when you just can’t seem to get the relationship to “work.”

I have extensive training in understanding human needs and behavior and I have over 25 years of experience applying this to my work as a couples counselor and marriage therapist in Bellevue, the Eastside and greater Seattle areas.  That said, I often think that just as important as my formal training and professional work is what I’ve experienced in being married for well over 30 years.  It’s one thing to read it in a book.  It’s another to live it.

The Kinds of Challenges that Bring Couples to My Office:

While every couple brings their own relationship history and struggles, I’ve found some common themes come up again and again.  Maybe some of these sound familiar to you:

  • Poor Communication
  • Destructive Conflicts
  • Lack of Emotional and/or Physical Intimacy
  • Aftermath of Affairs
  • Resentment and Difficulty Forgiving
  • Incompatibility

Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT) is an Effective Treatment for Relationship Problems

While I pay attention to the uniqueness of every couple, my guiding principles in this work come from Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT).  EFT has been recognized by the American Psychological Association as an empirically-proven, effective form of couples therapy. To find out more about EFT and why it’s so effective, CLICK HERE.

You will find that I will not judge either of you nor be a referee for your arguments.  My role is to help you see how you get stuck together in negative, reactive relationship patterns.  I will help you identify the deeper feelings and emotional needs that fuel these negative patterns and create relationship distress.  I will work to create a safe environment in which, perhaps for the first time, you can communicate these deeper feelings and needs to your partner in a way that invites understanding and a positive response, allowing you to experience the security and connection that you both desire.